Sunday, July 5, 2009  

Gardener Wanted

Given the events of the past year, it's become necessary for me to become the keeper of all things household, including the garden. Ever since I can remember, I have detested the idea of weeding and watering, pampering and pruning. To me, that has always been the man's work. Call it sexist, but I believe that a woman should take care of the majority of the inside chores - cooking, laundry, cleaning, tending to the kids. The man, on the other hand, did all the "dirty jobs" - fixing broken doors, cars, taking out the garbage, and yard work. My - how my views have changed.

I used to complain that "male chores" paled in comparison to "female chores." I mean really, how often does one need to water? How quickly can weeds grow once their roots are swiftly yanked out of the ground? And is mowing the lawn really that tough? HA! Yes, tending the yard may be a once or twice a week event, but it's no piece of cake. It's labor intensive, and for those who know me well, manual labor is not my thing. Not only that, I'm lacking the trait that most gardeners are born with - a green thumb. Funny how the daughter of a man who can grow lettuce in the middle of Las Vegas can find gardening such a mystery.

So as I looked at the not-so-green-greenery that was beginning to take over the back yard, I decided it was time that I learned how to prune the night blooming jasmine that was no longer in bloom. Granted, I have never trimmed anything more substantial than a rose tree, I figured that my limited knowledge would suffice in helping me reach my desired goal - a yard that looked more green than brown. With shears in hand, I attacked the bush that once produced the fragrant flowers for which it was named.

"A piece of cake," I thought as I slowly trimmed away the dried up blooms. Five minutes. Ten minutes. Fifteen minutes later, there I was, still trimming away. Geez. This plant wasn't even 3 feet tall. What was taking so long? Perhaps I was using the wrong tools. Perhaps I was being a little ginger in my approach. After all, I didn't want to kill the poor thing by chopping at anything that got in the way. My arms started to ache. The sun was beating down on my head. I started to drift into the "this isn't my job" mode that contributed to my lack of knowledge of the outdoors. So I turned to the philosophical and found a way to relate the yard work to my life.

Night blooming jasmine are characterized by the beautiful scent it gives off in the evening. The dainty white flowers exude a fragrance that is both calming and intense. Tended to correctly, the plant should bloom continuously. However, if not regularly tended to, it becomes an overgrown, unfragrant mess. My once beautiful vine was now dotted with brown blooms that more resembled weeds. So I started hacking away at the dead stuff to give life to the new growth struggling to get out.

Sometimes life throws us situations that seem impossible to survive. Some of us are strong enough deal with these trials head-on. Do what needs to be done to get to the next step and move on. More often than not, especially for me, it's easier to ignore and accommodate. Change my thoughts and beliefs to make the situation tolerable and hope that I can deal with it. However, in doing so, I've failed to tend my garden. I've let it grow into an intolerable mess. And just as it seemed to take forever to trim away the dead blooms from the plant, so will it be a while to remove the weeds that are suffocating the life longing to get out.

Gardening, therefore, is not such a bad thing. It is, in fact, extremely liberating. It's no wonder my dad used to immerse his self into tending the roses. The end result was always, and still is, so beautiful. I'm looking forward to being surrounded by the fragrance of the night blooming jasmine that will soon waft through the evening air. It will remind me of the beauty yet to come.

Chronicled @ 12:25 AM

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Thursday, June 11, 2009  

The joy of giving

I'm taking a day off from work to, well, regroup. It's been several weeks since I've thought about writing anything - a note, a grocery/to do list - let alone blog. But here I am, sitting in front of my computer, contemplating how nice it is not to be sitting at a desk, working on a computer and talking on the phone, all at the same time.

Wait a second. Isn't that what I'm doing right now? Funny how a little change of scenery makes all the difference. It's all about the environment.

After nearly 9 months in my little cubicle away from home, fluorescent lights blaring down on me while the outside world teases from my window view, I've decided that I shouldn't feel bad about giving myself some needed time off. Today is the last day of school for the kids. Traditionally I have always taken this day off to treat them to something special when they get home. A nice lunch. Maybe a movie. A little shopping. This year, though, I think it will be different.

My kids are growing like weeds. I am appreciative of the time that I was able to spend with them as a part-time worker, full-time mom. Now that I spend the majority of my day in an office, I wonder how time managed to slip past me so stealthily. Where did my son's first year in high school go? How did my kid make it through the first year in adolescent angst, hormone fluctuating junior high? And what about my innocent/not so innocent 5th grader? What happened this year? No field trips. No classroom volunteering. Just the daily grind of getting the kids ready for school, packing lunches, rushing to work then rushing home to make dinner, getting in a few minutes of time to ask about their day or help with homework. How have all those moms done it all those years? Then I remember, truly I am blessed.

I am giving myself a moment to contemplate that, even during these tough times, there is still joy to be found everywhere, as long as you give yourself a moment to notice it. The joy of knowing my kids have so much to experience, and I am there with them. The joy of realizing that my family and friends are the most supportive and loving people I know. The joy of waking up to experience a new day. The joy of smelling freshly baked mango muffins in my kitchen (yes, I baked them from scratch.) And most of all, the joy on my daughter's face when I pick her up from school. And this makes all the hard work worth it.

Chronicled @ 11:36 AM

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Wednesday, November 19, 2008  

Looking back...

There it was again. That tinge of angst that I couldn't shake. Dismissing it as the caffeine-on-an-empty-stomach shakes, I press my badge up to the card reader, listen for the click that signals it is OK to enter, walk through the glass door, down the corridor and straight to the cubicle where I now spend the majority of my day staring at a computer screen and laughing with coworkers that I am finally starting to feel comfortable with. I boot up the computer, log into the phone and wait. Wait for the system to kick in, wait for the first customer call, wait for the boss to ask me what I've got in the pipeline today. And then I sigh - deeply - and look at the calendar.

I know what today is. I knew it was coming up. I had been talking about it like it was nothing, but in reality, it was/is something. It is the one year anniversary of that "call" - the one that left me feeling as if the rug had just been pulled out from underneath me. The one with the cold, callous, strange voice on the other end telling me that I needed to visit HR the next day for my "exit" interview. The one that said I had been "chosen." The one that changed me in ways I never thought it would. Could this be why I'm feeling out of sorts today? Possibly. Probably. Definitely.

It's hard to believe that a year has already passed. It's also hard to believe that it's only been a year, as it feels like a lifetime ago. I try to imagine my old self - the routine of walking through the glass doors, through the lobby to the card reader where I place my badge for entry, down the corridor to the desk that I called home for many, many years. Familiar faces, familiar spaces, familiar everything. A place that, despite its obvious downward spiral, I was still happy to report to - five days a week, five hours a day.

A lot of my friends have moved on, some by choice, some by force. I know I've fared a lot better than most, many of whom are still looking for work. Yeah, I've found a job. Yes, I've made some new friends. Sure, it's a paycheck. Definitely, it's a blessing in its own, unique way. Despite all of that, I still grieve, even after one year. Not so much for the forced, life changing event, but for what used to be. More accurately, for what had ceased to be long before I was let go. The newspaper was my family, beginning with my immediate coworkers to the cafeteria staff, all the way up to the big wigs in HR. How can that ever be recaptured?

The answer - it can't. But it can be fondly remembered. And it is, daily. It's just a little more difficult today.

Chronicled @ 10:00 PM

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Tuesday, November 4, 2008  

Ch-ch-ch-ch-changes

November - the month of change. It marks the end of daylight savings time. Thank goodness for that extra hour of much needed sleep. Whoever invented this ridiculous moving of the clock back and forth should be shot. November brings fireplace weather, cold breezes and rainy skies. It goes hand-in-hand with the extra snooze time. November marks the beginning of the holiday season, though the argument could be made that Halloween starts the celebrating. But more notable this year than anything else is this very emotional, very heated presidential election. November brings a new president to the United States.

Whether you bleed blue or red, there's no arguing that we are witness to one of the most historical events of our lifetimes. After 8 years under the Bush regime, we need someone fresh, someone who will make the general population feel good about being citizens of these United States of America. Is it gonna be the man who survived torture in the jungles of Vietnam? Will we elect the young, charismatic African American lawyer? Whoever takes the helm will inherit a boat load of troubles. Whoever wins will have all eyes on them to solve the ills of this country. Whoever we choose to be the next leader is definitely in the hot seat.

The truth of the matter is, though, regardless of the campaign promises either candidate has made, one can almost guarantee that most of them will not come to fruition. (I'd say never, but that's so pessimistic.) There is hope, though, and that is the dream that Obama has sold to us. Hope. If you have nothing but that, you've got everything. Now it's time to move that hope into action.

How? Let's hold our leaders accountable for what they promise us. Let's make sure that our constitutional rights are protected and kept intact. Let's demand honesty in the way our government deals with this so called "war on terror" and financial crisis. Let's watch carefully how our new president and his cabinet shape the policies of this nation. Let's expect CHANGE.

Chronicled @ 7:53 PM

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Tuesday, October 28, 2008  

Rules - so many rules!

Mulitiple choice question - fill in the blanks as they pertain to elementary school.

Rules are _____.
1) necessary to promote safety and order.
2) meant to be broken.
3) written to give the people at the top reason to control everyone beneath his/her level.

Kids _____.
1) need rules to protect themselves and others from harm, physically and socially.
2) need to learn from their own experiences and grow from them.
3) are harmed when there are too many rules.

As a parent, it's apparent that rules are a necessary element of elementary school culture. When there are hundreds of kids on one single campus under the care of, at the most, 50 overworked adults, rules must exist to keep some sense of order. Recently, though, our principal has put demands on the elementary school kids (that's ages 6 - 11) that border stupidity and take away from their most basic need - socialization and playtime. Thankfully she hasn't taken these rights of childhood away, but she's given "guidelines" on how the kids can spend their out-of-classroom time.

At lunchtime, students must sit at tables assigned to their classroom. They cannot sit with friends if they are in a different room. The reason for this? She says that in case a parent is trying to locate their child at lunchtime (which happens at least 3 to 4 times a day - NOT) prearranged seating makes it easier for the adults in charge to locate him or her. Additionally, it is easier for the adults to account for all of the children if they are in a predesignated area, making for a safer lunch time experience.

Secondly, use of the playground will be rotated on a daily basis for the primary grades, 1 through 3. A morning announcement is made, detailing which students are allowed use of the play structures for that particular day. In all fairness, this was started because of on-site construction for safety reasons. However, the construction has been completed and she refuses to do away with this policy. How this is enforced I cannot imagine. I envision a row of police-teachers lined up around the tanbark box, kinda like security at the World Series. "Sorry kid - this area is designated for 2nd graders only."

Now that I'm not on the school campus that often, and especially since I now have kids at three different schools, it's difficult to keep up to date on what is going on. I caught wind of this because a friend decided to include me on an email chain that started with, of all people, a PTA volunteer (gosh I miss that motley group!) Does anyone recognize this as the legalization of taking away basic rights? Come on - any school administrator who feels that controlling kids' free time is the best way to keep children safe should not be in that position. Kids need to be kids during their free time so that they can expend their boundless amounts of energy outside of the classroom. Without this free time, this freedom, chaos in the classroom is bound to ensue.

So the true reason for my ranting is this. Move this thought into the bigger world - our adult world. A world that is wrought with endless rules and regulations. Wear your seatbelt - it's for your own safety. Don't forget to wear a helmet when you ride your bike - it's for your own safety. I do those things anyway, but do we really need a law to tell us what is good for our own safety?!

With election day being a week away, think about what liberties we are losing and at what cost when you mark your ballot. Don't legalize the taking away of our rights as humans. Keep the government out of our bedrooms and our private lives. No on 8 - let people love who they want, how they want. No on 4 - instead put into place programs that help teens deal with this extremely difficult decision. Enforcing a law that makes medical professionals act as narcs will bring more harm than good.

Vote with your conscience. I'll quote something my sister said. The Constitution was written to give us liberties, not to take them away.

Chronicled @ 8:30 PM

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Wednesday, October 22, 2008  

Let the craziness begin

Here's an interesting link to a story that could, if true, throw a wrench into the Obama campaign and forever scar the Democratic party and the faith of the American voters. As the election nears, expect more "stuff" like this to surface. I haven't done my due diligence to figure out if this is authentic, but here you go.

http://www.rense.com/general83/berg.htm

Chronicled @ 9:22 AM

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Friday, October 17, 2008  

So much for kicking the habit

The intent is there. The desire is there. What's lacking is the will power. And a bit of advanced planning & organization. I must confess that since putting in writing my commitment to tighten up my finances by cutting back on unnecessary expenses, such as coffee and eating out, I've - what can I say - fallen a little short of my goal.

Two days into it I found myself in Starbucks because I ran out of coffee creamer. A few days after that, I was in the Starbucks drive-through. And three days in a row I succumbed to having someone else prepare dinner (like Subway & Pizza Hut) because I didn't want to have to clean up the kitchen. Who wants to do that after working all day?

Ever the bargain hunter, though, I've found the best places to grab some grub for a decent price.

Subway - $5 footlong sandwiches. Eat half, bring the rest for lunch the next day. OR, buy one and split it, and the cost, with someone else.

Tuesday night pizza - Both Straw Hat and Stuft Pizza have 1/2 price pizza on Tuesday nights. I can get 2 large pizzas for less than $25!

Costco roasted chicken - I think the prices have gone up, but one chicken goes a long way.

Taco Bell - 99 cent burritos - 79 cent tacos. Not the healthiest of choices, but given the price, need I say more?

So that is my one week update. Week two will be better.

Here's a sign of the economic times. Today we (meaning me and all of my coworkers) received an email sent on behalf of our CEO. Due to the economy, our company will not be holding its holiday party. Instead, each employee will receive $10 so that each department can throw their own party. Anything above the $10, of course, will be out of our own pockets. What a nice gesture! I think it would have been less insulting to the tenured employees if he just announced the cancellation without a consolation prize. I haven't seen a company holiday party in years, but I liken it to when the Mercury News stopped giving their employees turkeys at Thanksgiving. Not a lot of happy campers when that announcement was made.

But you know what? At least I had a job back then, even if I didn't have a free 13 lb. turkey. And I least I have a job now, so that I can feed my caffeine habit and feed my family. And as the latest round of layoffs in the Valley illustrates, there is no such thing as a stable job. If the holiday party needs to be canceled to keep some folks (such as myself) employed, I'll gladly forgo the festivities. And hopefully after a weekend of contemplation, my coworkers will feel the same.

Chronicled @ 10:52 PM

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